Sex: the flame in between the sheets, the binding glue of romance and the ultimate intimacy a couple can ever share. I cannot think of a more intimate act with such effect on hormones, mood and overall health of the couple.
It is said that once a man and a woman indulge in sex, it is impossible to think clearly or to focus on other issues at hand objectively. This is because sex involves more than just physical indulgence, it is an emotional and spiritual indulgence where emotions are taken to their peak intensity.
Most couples abandon the foreplay to a sexual intercourse, especially after marriage. I think of foreplay as a preview to a good movie. It creates curiosity, interest, and desire. Therefore, if the foreplay is missing, the interest wanes and so does desire. No wonder marriages have turned out to be monotonous, boring, and dull affairs. I am dedicated and have made it my mission to bring back the flames into the fireplace of marriage;
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Sexting: If you did this when you were dating, why did you stop. This creates anticipation, memories, fun, and romance in the relationship. If it turned you on then, especially when it came from your lover, what changed? I am not talking about the cheap overrated pornographic clips that people share; but rather romantic sensual, sexy messages directed to your lover and spouse. Make him/her revisit those emotions you shared when dating, just by using text messages, old romantic photos of you, cute captions of letters or cards they wrote to you etc.
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Love talk/Pillow talk: This is always a nice to unwind on your lover’s lap or on his chest as you share the day’s events, your dreams or just ‘chillaxing’. bring back the memories of appreciating each other’s company especially after a hard day’s work. I know this may sound impossible with kids all around you, but where there is a will there is a way. That sound of his heart beating under your ear, the smell of her perfume, her warm embrace, her fingers stroking your hair as you chat… heavenly.
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Love whispers: There is nothing I appreciate as much as that whisper, my husband drops on me as I am busy in the kitchen cooking! I love it. When you see you spouse having a hard time with housework or being driven up the wall by the little ones, just sneak up to him/her and say those magic words in his/her ear. Remind them you appreciate them and that you love them. you can top this up with an earlobe nibble or play with your teeth, or you can give them a sensual squeeze, kiss, or hug.
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Massage: You do not have to be an expert to know that everyone adores a two-minute massage to release pressure. If you can do a longer massage, good for both of you as we all know where it leads! I personally tend to have achy shoulders and tired feet. I keep a bottle of our favourite relaxing oil by our beside. As we unwind getting ready to sleep, any one of us can take the oil and give the other spouse a gentle rub on the back, a foot massage or just simple head and temple massage. The intention is to make your spouse to relax, to sleep better or even to put both of you into an erotic mode for the night.
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Dinner for two: If you can afford to send your kids to their grandparents or auntie’s for the night, this would be the ideal time for you to set up a romantic dinner for two. Prepare his/her favourite dish and set it up romantically with your favourite drinks on the side. If you can, dress up or dress down for the occasion. Make the night to be entirely about the two of you. No business, work talks, no speculations about the children, no external interference. If you have a movie you both like, you can watch it too. If this is not possible, an occasional date for dinner out is always a welcome treat and romantic as well.
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Flowers and Chocolate: I love flowers; He adores chocolate. Do I have to buy him an expensive chocolate just on special occasions? Should I get a rose just on my birthday? I love finding a Rose (Just one, will do) on my pillow as I walk out of the shower getting ready for bed. How about the bad guy biting the rose waiting for me as he poses on the bed?
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Sticky notes: Beautiful messages in the morning are a great motivator. A love note left on the bathroom mirror, in his/her diary, a card sent by mail ( For distant relationships) and a date proposal hidden in her shoe/ his wallet. An apology note on the refrigerator or simply an “I Love You” note in his/her closet. Remember to leave ‘thank you’ notes for all your spouse does. Simple. Intimate. Profound. Romantic.
Contrary to common belief, romance does not have to be very expensive. It is the simple daily actions that can send your spouse singing your praises, day and night. How do you create the spark in your love life? I would love to know. Please leave me a message below. Remember to follow me on twitter@guruhellen.com and on Facebook. Feel free to share this blog with your loved ones.
To your hot and romantic married life.
Guruhellen
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